Although this was a triumph of motherhood – I was definitely doing the right thing – it was not one of planning. I was wearing high heels, a suit, no raincoat or hat, and nothing more than an umbrella I had picked up at Chapters over the weekend.  It was black and seemed utilitarian when I decided to buy it but yesterday, as I stood among hundreads of people on soggy grass I noticed it had an interesting feature.  On the inside of the umbrella was the image of Nova Scotia’s newly renovated Province House.  So here I was watching the Queen with her official residence – in this Province – keeping me dry, sort of.  What a strange and wonderful day.

This year we are adding a charitable element to our annual hair cut.  We are going to a hair salon that is donating it’s hair clippings to the Gulf oil spill clean-up.  Hair soaks up oil. Hair cuttings that would normally be in our landfills are being stuffed into pantyhose to make oil booms for the Gulf oil spill. The Cosmetology Association of Nova Scotia is collecting hair and pantyhose at their office in Halifax and will ship it to the Gulf.  If you are getting your hair cut in the next little while check and see if your stylist is involved in this initiative.

This weekend Woozles saw me twice, and the gift cards have been depleted. I, however, didn’t need either of those for one of the parties.  I have a friend who always comes up with great ideas. She is the one who got me onto the mock sleepover.  That is where the kids come over in their jammies, have all the fun of a sleepover but go home at 9. She is also the brains behind the book exchange birthday party.  For the last couple of years, she has asked that every child invited to the party bring a book they have read and no longer want/need.  She asks that it be wrapped with no card.  At the end of the party, each child goes and takes one of the wrapped treasures home.  This weekend my daughter scored a couple of Nancy Drew mysteries which she is very excited to start reading.  This may not work for everyone but I think it’s a good idea to spread around.

I don’t think that the seat is on any recall lists but I decided to be safe. I brought it back and took my 20% discount on a new booster seat.  It just seemed to make sense to me.  The deal is available to everyone until this weekend.

My initial thought was that I could not do that. Then I started asking myself why: I believe in stricter rules on products for kids; I think child safety is important; and, I could fit it into my schedule.  I realized the only reason I was opposed to doing the speech was that I had never done anything like it before.  Certainly that is not a good enough reason.

If one of my kids had been asked to do something new, I would have encouraged them to do it.  I also probably wouldn’t have let them get away with not doing it because of fear.

I agreed to do the speech.  It was this morning and I think it went fine. The Minister of Health and the President of Toys R Us were both there – it really was their event.  They explained the new legislation, the impact on consumers, and the need for retailer support.

I added my thoughts about parental responsibility and the importance of safe toys and children’s products from my perspective. I explained that in my world toys are rarely used for the purpose they were intended – in fact in my back yard is a dismembered doll arm that is being used as a bat for a pair of rolled up socks.  I am happy that there will be experts figuring out if the toys – in all their forms – are safe.

In the end, I faced my fear of the unknown and supported a piece of legislation that will make toys and children’s products safer.  For more information on the legislation click here or visit the Health Canada site.

While I was mulling over my options  (get a plastic bag and struggle to keep it on the seat, take a cab and leave the bike until the weather cleared up, go get a coffee and hope for a sudden burst of sunshine to dry my seat), I walked into a store called “Love Me”.  As luck would have it,  they sold bicycle seat covers.  I kid you not.  They look like nothing more than a shower cap made out of vinyl with old fashioned designs.  It turns out a Canadian artist makes them for days like this.  So I picked one up and headed home with a decorated bike and a dry bum.

I lead a good life - for which I feel grateful and guilty

Over the past few months I have gone back to work in an office.  I have been working from home for 6 years.  As hectic as it has been, I wasn’t quite prepared for the rigors of office life.  I had forgotten what it was like to get out of the house for an early morning meeting or how hard it is to manage a household from a distance. I had also forgotten how going back to work carries with it a lot of guilt.  Guilt that you aren’t home, that the kids don’t have my full attention 24/7 and simply guilt that I am not home.

After 5 months I am finally over this.  I have accepted that the house will be a mess, that the laundry basket will be a never ending mound of unfolded clothes and that my kids will complain that I am never there when they need me – which I would argue isn’t true, just for the record.  I have also decided to stop feeling guilty that I haven’t kept up my blog and to start doing something about it.  So today, marks a new chapter in my ever-changing life.  The one where guilt is a wasted emotion and writing OtherMothers becomes a priority again.  I hope you guys continue to check us out.

 First a little background info. A friend and I recently decided to live abroad and work as au pairs as a means to do so. We had contact with the family for more than six months, obtained refences and proper documentation and did everything according to the way it should be done in order to choose the best match possible. The day I arrived with this family is the day I realised that I was not the au pair for them. We soon realised that not only were we not suited for their family, but their family was not suited for au pairs and this is the reason they have been through ten au pairs and sitters in two years. Rather than drag their name through the mud by divuldging many of the interesting things that we have experienced since arriving, I am going to share with you the moral of the story. For me, the moral is: be sure to pick a) the right kind of child care and b) the right person to provide this care. (Another moral might be: don’t pack up your life and fly half way across the world before doing a thurough background check on the people you are to live with… but I’ll leave that for another day).

 Most families have had some sort of child care and all families who have would appreciate that the work relationship you have with the person who cares for the loves of your life is unlike any other work relationship. Most of us who take care of children do not do it just to make a dime; we genuinely love children, think like children or are gifted with the ability to entertain/teach/calm children. Of course, even if they drive us bonkers we end up becoming very close with the little munchkins and often they become attatched to us. This is the primary reason it is so important for parents to be certain they choose the right kind of child care. Most kids are fairly resiliant and adjust to new people but having ever-changing child care can be very stressful on children.

I am not implying that I think any parent meets a random person and says: “hey… I need to run to the gym. Can you watch my kids for a sec? Here’s a twenty.” This being said, I do think that parents may choose the child care that is popular in their area or with their friends and might not consider the many other options; day care of course, nanny, live-in nanny, occasional sitter, shared nanny, and au-pair both live in and live out. Each option has its pros and cons. My suggestion is that when looking for a form of child care be open while at the same time, go with your gut and what you know about your family. For example, if you have older children who could benefit from exposure to a different culture and an extra room consider an au pair. But if your family has any special circumstances or ways of living that a live-in might not adjust well to, do not simply assume that things will work themselves out.Then again, just because you have an extra room and would like a more cost efficient form of child care does not mean you should have live-in care. If you are trying to save some money, consider another option such as “doubling up” or “sitter sharing”.

Ultimately, the best policy is to evaluate your family’s needs and what you want out of child care and then think about what your family has to offer in terms of both pay and work environment. Most importantly, be open and honest. No matter what, it is always better to take responsibility for your family’s ups and the downs and inform the person before hiring them, just as you would expect them to inform you. Certainly none of you would want to find out that the sitter you just hired to take your kids to the Waeg every day hates walking and swimming and is allergic to the sun!

Overall, if things do not work out with one type of child care or one person, learn from the past and do not make the same mistake twice… or ten times!